I was IMing with my lovely wife today. On the bottom left of the little chat screen I see a link that says "IM with JoinBode". Being the Olympictician that I am, I immediately clicked on it. Here is my conversation with downhill skier and corporate icon, Bode Miller.
grantparkcoker: Bode Miller?
joinbode: Wassup Grantparkcoker! I'm JoinBode, brought 2 u by Nike. 2 read my privacy policy, click here.Ready 2 Join Bode? Type home right now!
grantparkcoker: Is anyone there?
joinbode: Anyone almost certainly is.
grantparkcoker: Bode, or Bodeist....why has Bode not won any medals?
joinbode: Because.
grantparkcoker: Because? Because Nike spent so much money supporting this ad campaign of him as a rebel when all he is is just a whiney sub-par athlete who peaked 4 years ago?
joinbode:
grantparkcoker: You are as vacuous and innane as Bode, you IM bot!
joinbode: What r u asking me?
grantparkcoker: I thought Bode Miller was more eloquent...vaguer, but more eloquent. Cannot the almighty Bode Miller type using full words such as "are" and "you"?
joinbode:
grantparkcoker: Exxon might run their oil tankers aground, causing the deaths of thousands of innocent animals. Nike might ruin the lives of hundreds of overseas children in their sweatshops...but you are ruining the olympic spirit Bode Miller! You are eroding the one thing capable of bringing the world together with your corporate ventriloquism!
joinbode:
grantparkcoker: How can I join Bode?
joinbode: JoinBode.com is a way 2 discover the philosopy of Bode Miller. And in the spirit of discovery, JoinBode.com allows u 2 explore Bode's environment: his home, where he trains, where he hangs out, his hometown.Ready 2 Join Bode? Click here.
grantparkcoker: Oh, I know what his environment is: home - Nike headquarters training place: his own mind! hangout: Ego-Central Pizza hometown: definitely not the medal stand.
joinbode:
grantparkcoker: Nike?
joinbode: What about Nike?
grantparkcoker: Why does Nike endorse you?
joinbode: Hmm... I really dunno why Nike endorses me.
Telling, I think. Oh, and did you see the one about the Olympian who didn't want to win a medal? Shani Davis. What's wrong with America? We're either 16 year old gnarly chicks or egotistic maniacs!