Friday, October 21, 2005

Mr. Microencephalous

Greetings fellow hobbits, I'll be your guide on this little trip. Over there and back we'll go, from 12,000 years ago till now. Forgive me, I haven't introduced myself--some call me Mr. Baggins. But I go by many other names, Bilbo, Uncle, and even Homo floresiensis. Well that last one is reserved for those that really know me.
Confused? Scientists were recently poking around (as they always do) in Indonesia. Well, they have been since 2004 when they discovered a very small head of what they believe is a "hobbit-like" species, a possible precursor to mankind and definite humanoids. After they go through the awkward teenage years, all pimply faced (weirdest before/after pics ever), the best they have in store for them is a three foot height and a brain the size of a chimpanzee's. Just recently they are shocking the scientific community with an article on the jawbone of their eleventh subject. What else could you find in a moist cave in a very small isolated island chain? Apparently the answer to that question is dwarf elephants. Honey, I Shrunk the Archipelago!

An island with slightly more people on it, England, was host to one of the most famous scientific frauds in history. It is a story that has always captured my imagination. A laborer happens upon an old bone in a gravel pit...takes it to his local archeologist (every town needs a local archeologist) and the world takes note. Further excavations took place, despite the ominous warnings of the curse of the mummy! (Just kidding about the mummy part). More bones were found...a human like head with an apelike jaw? Must be our ancestor! Or, as discovered 40 years later, it must be a human head with an orangutan's jaw and teeth which had been chemically altered to look authentic and ancient.

This "earliest Englishman", the great hope of proving mankind sprung from its apeish beginnings in the glorious land of England, became the great embarassment of the UK scientific community. Charles Dawson, the local archaeologist, never had quite the same luck with the geek groupies that he did during those four decadent decades. Various people have been named as possible suspects in this whodunit, including Sir Arthur Conan Doyle himself(who incidentally resembles like Prez Teddy!)

Ah youthful scientific vigor! Oh nationalistic hubris! You two are so cute together. If you love yourself some good scientific mysteries, check out more on the Piltdown Man here and here. Cheers to science!! (that last link is a good one!)

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